Mother’s Day can trigger complex emotions no matter what kind of relationship existed. Today we talk about how the loss of a mother can affect us, and how we can grow through it.
In This Episode:
- 02:58 – Recipe of the Week: Ex-Girlfriend’s Mom’s Salsa Fresca (Pico de Gallo)
- 03:56 – An Obituary to Remember: Lois Ann Harry
- 09:17 – The Physiology Behind the Mother -Daughter Connection
- 12:28 – How the Death of a Mother Affects Daughters
- 29:25 – Tips to Improve Communication with Mothers
- 33:46 – Mother and Child Reunion
- 35:42 – Outro
Mother-daughter relationships are among the most significant of our lives, but they can also be the thorniest to manage. Which is why the death of your mother is a life-changing event. Grieving the death of a mother can break you down, overwhelm you, and eventually rebuild you. Death can knit together as much as it can tear apart.
“Your mother’s death will change you, and that is the only predictable part of the process.”
Improving Communication Now
Mother-daughter relationships can sometimes be tricky, especially while in a caregiver role. Charlie shared several tips on how to improve communication.
How can communication be improved between mothers and daughters?
Improving communication between mothers and daughters involves practicing active listening, respecting each other’s boundaries, and engaging in regular conversations. Openness and honesty are crucial, as well as using “I” statements for expressing thoughts and feelings. Avoiding blame, criticism, or harsh language can also help create a safe space for communication.
Does the mother-daughter relationship change with age?
Mother-daughter patterns of closeness strengthen with aging because mothers and daughters assume together more of the responsibility for maintaining relationships within the family.
How can I learn more about mother-daughter relationships?
Be sure to listen to the full podcast for more information and great tips on improving communication with your mom as an adult.
Related Content:
- S3E17: Grieving A Mother’s Death
- S5E01: How to Cope When a Complicated Parent Dies
- S1E33: Adult Orphan
- The Tao of Ironing
References:
- Science Explains Why The Mother-Daughter Bond Is SO Powerful (scarymommy.com)
- Yamagata, B., Murayama, K., Black, J. M., Hancock, R., Mimura, M., Yang, T. T., Reiss, A. L., & Hoeft, F. (2016). Female-Specific Intergenerational Transmission Patterns of the Human Corticolimbic Circuitry. The Journal of neuroscience: the official journal of the Society for Neuroscience, 36(4), 1254–1260. https://doi.org/10.1523/JNEUROSCI.4974-14.2016
- How to Improve Mother-Daughter Relationships: Effective Techniques and Tips (healingcollectivetherapy.com)
- Marks, N. F., Jun, H., & Song, J. (2007). Death of Parents and Adult Psychological and Physical Well-Being: A Prospective U.S. National Study. Journal of family issues, 28(12), 1611–1638. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513X07302728
- The Mother-Daughter Bond | Psychology Today
Resources:
- 29 Tips to Improve Your Mother – Daughter Relationship (psychcentral.com)
- 17 Mother Daughter Bonding Activities To Stay Close & Connected At Any Age (romper.com)
- How to Improve Mother-Daughter Relationships: Effective Techniques and Tips (healingcollectivetherapy.com)
An Obituary to Remember
Charlie read the amazing accomplishments of Lois Ann Harry (July 18, 1931 ~ October 30, 2019 – age 88), who on top of being a great mother and grandmother with numerous “activities”, had a very memorable demise. We are pretty sure you are nudging someone with the creative chops in your family…try to top this when I die!
Mother and Child Reunion
Charlie shared the lyrics of this Paul Simon song and the interesting history behind it. While we love Charlie’s poetry, here’s the sung version!
Recipe of the Week
Well, we all love our mom’s recipes, but this poster couldn’t part with the girlfriend’s mother’s salsa, even after the romance faded! Check out this Ex-Girlfriend’s Mom’s Salsa Fresca (Pico de Gallo) as the perfect appetizer for a Mother’s Day grill (or funeral lunch?). Get it from All Recipes.
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https://blog.feedspot.com/palliative_care_podcasts/
Everyone Dies: and yes, it is normal!
Everyone Dies (and yes, it is normal) is a story about a young boy named Jax who finds something special on the beach where he and his grandpa Pops are enjoying a wonderful day. Pops helps Jax understand that death is a normal part of life. This book provides an age appropriate, non-scary, comfortable way to introduce the important topic of mortality to a preschool child. Its simple explanation will last a lifetime. Autographed copies for sale at: www.everyonediesthebook.com. Also available at Amazon
Mourning Jewelry
We offer a way to memorialize your loved one or treasured pet with a piece of handmade jewelry. When people comment on it and the wearer can say for example “I received this when my mother died” which opens the conversation about this loss. All our jewelry is made with semi-precious stones and beads, vintage beads, and pearls. You can choose between earrings or bracelets and the color family. Learn More
