S2E6: The Stages of Grief

Loss is the absence of something valued: actual or perceived. Grief is the emotional feeling as it relates to the loss. Grief and loss can be experienced by a wide range of experiences (e.g., death of a family member or pet, illness) and even events that may bring us joy (e.g., retirement, graduation).

How do we make sense of loss? You may ask about the “normal stages of grieving” and want someone to explain how long each stage lasts. There is a misconception that there are “normal” stages of grief, based on Kübler-Ross’ five stages of grief. What isn’t known is that the model is outdated and not supported by research…her work was published in 1969, hypothesizing stages for late-stage terminal illness patients who were dying. It was never meant to be a model for grief for the living. Even in her later work, she stated that there are not linear stops, and that not everyone goes through the stages.

Why is the 5-stage model so prevalent? We feel powerless in the grieving process. People want order and predictability in their lives, and this model provides that predictability.

Listen to learn more about what grief really is and how we heal.

We also are pleased to present an interview with Dr. Ken Doka about the stages of grieving.  Dr. Doka has keynoted conferences throughout North America as well as Europe, Asia, Australia, and New Zealand. He participates in the annual Hospice Foundation of America Teleconference and has appeared on CNN and Nightline. In addition, he has served as a consultant to medical, nursing, funeral service, and hospice organizations as well as businesses and educational and social service agencies. For a longer interview with Dr. Doka, listen to our PWTRN interview.

Resources:

We have several other topics on grief. On the top of our webpage, go to Topics, and see the drop-down for Grief. There are also sub-categories for Child Grief, Death of a Pet, etc. You can also find these categories on our home page. Click here to see the entire Grief Category:

Here are some select podcasts about grief:

Recipe Time

Charlie shares his family recipes – which are also his “happy food”! He claims happy food is also heathly food…but we’re not sure about the gummies. But Charlie digressed…

giant gummy bear - Alexas Fotos

Charlie’s Tipsy Gummy Bears

  • INGREDIENTS: Gummy bears & Vodka
  • On a plate…any type of flat plate will do, cover the plate with gummi bears. It is important for them to be only one layer thick!
  • Add vodka, and marinate 90 seconds +/- depending on humidity

Charlie’s Salty Nuts

INGREDIENTS

  • 8 tablespoons butter
  • 1/4 cup honey
  • 2–3 tablespoons hot sauce
  • 1/2 cup whiskey
  • 1 tablespoon kosher salt
  • 1 heaping teaspoon garlic powder
  • 8 cups raw nuts (I used pecans, cashews, and almonds)
  • I’m going rogue and saying garlic powder is optional

Mix all ingredients, spread in a single layer in a pan.  Bake 325 23-26 minutes, stir every 5-10 minutes.

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